Fallen For You

Chapter 5: Illness
Part 1



Zelda’s words made little to no sense to the mercenary. He couldn’t fathom that the love of his life was critically ill; much less that he was the root cause of it. He stared at the princess until her anger melted into sadness. She sobbed softly to herself before running off, leaving the bluenette in his daze. The only thing that brought him back to reality was a loving hand on his shoulder.

“Ikus?” his lover called softly. “Are you okay?”

The larger man resisted the urge to question his spouse then and there. Pit’s happiness on his birthday took top priority over all. “Everything’s fine, my Angel,” he assured, turning to embrace the Fallen. The young man smiled. “Are you having fun at your party?”

“Oh, yes, Ikus! Thank you so much!” the Angel praised, kissing his husband passionately.

***

I heave a shaky sigh and take a moment to collect my thoughts. “Well, there you have it. My big wake-up call… A turning point in my life…”

Mist looks out the window. I can see all the questions in her eyes. Is it true? Why? How did you make it happen? Is he alive now? If not, how can you live with yourself?

She doesn’t ask any of them. “Did you ever talk to him about what Zelda said?... or did you just watch and wait?”

I find it easier to think with my face in my hands. I hope she can still hear me, because I don’t have the strength to raise my head. “I did talk to him about it. A week after the party, while we were in bed together…”

***

Ike lay in the double bed, directly in the middle. It felt odd to him, since he usually slept closer to the nightstand. However, it was now part of their nightly ritual for Pit to take half an hour to write in his Lifebook about the day’s events. The bluenette was more than happy to allow the Angel to lie in his spot in order to be closer to the lamp. Once accomplished, the Fallen would turn off the light and the two would either switch spots or make love, depending on how tired the brunette was.

“Ikus,” the young man called softly, as he marked his place. “I love you, but you seem off lately.”

“What makes you say that, my Angel?” the larger man inquired, looking at his spouse out of the corner of his eye.

“Well… Your energy is troubled, and your love is breezy with concern.”

“How long have you noticed this, baby?”

“… Since my birthday.”

Ike nodded and sighed. Before replying, he took a peak at his lover’s journal, and noticed that the feather that marked his page had moved remarkably far into the book. Pit had once shared with him the importance of saving space in a Lifebook, since Celestials live for centuries. He noted with a heavy heart that Pit was now halfway through the large book. “I’ve noticed that you’ve been writing more,” he stated, trying to keep his voice calm.

The Fallen hung his head. “I have.”

A long silence ensued. The brunette stared intently at his Lifebook while his spouse stared up at the ceiling, fighting back tears. Finally, the bluenette pulled his husband into a warm embrace and kissed the top of his head. He pulled the Angel’s face up to look him in the eyes. “How long have you been sick?” he asked.

“Since I fell,” Pit replied, his eyes watery, but in no immediate danger of overflowing.

“And, this illness… is because you don’t talk to your goddess?”

The Fallen shook his head. “No… An Angel can only open their heart to one person. And, that one person becomes their life support. Usually, it is the Angel’s deity, whose love gives them warmth. So long as an Angel has their heart filled with the love of their deity, they see and feel the world as normal, and they are warm and free to live a long and happy life until their light leaves and returns to the deity.”

Ike nodded. “But you shut your heart off to your goddess… the night I told you that I loved you. You never told me what happened after that…”

Pit sighed. “The separation of removing myself from the world was intense. I could no longer feel Palutena, and the world had gone so cold. I had to go back to Her, and see if She could help me be warm again. But leaving you was so hard; even when I got home, I couldn’t get you out of my head. I told Her what was happening, and She tried to help me, but… the only way for me to be at peace and feel the world again was to lose all my memories of you.

“Ikus, I can’t live in a world that doesn’t have you in it; now that I know you exist. I told her that I would accept my Fall, because I wouldn’t be living without you. Out of the good grace of her heart, she allowed me to land near you. It’s a blessing, Ike, when I could have landed in any dimension. I could have been sent to Hell for the sin of lusting for a mortal, but she sent me here to be with you. I am so grateful,” he whispered, holding the larger man’s hand to his chest. Ike could feel how cold the young man was under his nightly attire.

“So what’s happening to you? You have no love from Palutena? Why is this killing you?” Ike asked, his voice getting choked up with anxiety and worry.

“An Angel is sensitive to all the love around them, but they can only feel it coming from one person. Palutena is a Goddess, and she exists everywhere, not just in heaven. I  can feel the warmth of her love in every blade of grass, every raindrop, and every snowflake. I was never cold before. But, when I Fell, my only source of love and warmth became you.

“You are a mortal, and you only exist in your body, so when I am close, I feel the warmth of your love. But, the rest of the world is cold to me. It’s like living in a freezer. The sun no longer warms my skin, nor does it feed me like it used to. Mortal food is fun, but I barely taste it. The only thing that keeps my heart beating is your undying love.”

“Pit!” Ike cried, holding the Angel tighter. “My Gods! What have I done to you!?”

The young man spread his ebony wings around his distressed spouse, enshrouding them in darkness. In the gloom, the bluenette felt chilled lips press to his cheek. “You’ve shown me nothing but love.”

“Pit, I’m killing you!”

“No! Not at all. You’re the reason I’m still living; even now…”

“But you won’t live forever. I’m a mortal! What will happen to you if anything happens to me?! You’ll freeze to death!”

A soft but cool hand caressed the mercenary’s cheek, wiping away the tears. “Unless you die before your time, Ikus, I’ll be long since gone… What’s happening to me is slow, but… not so slow that I’ll get to see my thirtieth birthday.”

Ike shuddered, too horrified to even scream. He only held his husband around the shoulders and stroked his hair. “Pit, no. No, baby. You can’t die. No, I don’t care if I never see you again, Pit! You have to go to your Goddess! Open your heart to her! Erase all your memories of me! Live a long and happy life! Have a big family! You deserve so much more than I can give you!”

Warm lips silenced the man’s pleas.

“I already made my choice six years ago. I was scared at first, because I knew that my life would be short. I didn’t even know if you would still love me after I left you, but when all my fears were at their peak, you held me in your arms and made me feel better. I was finally warm again, in your embrace,” he said, snuggling deeper into his lover’s arms and placing his head under the mercenary’s chin. “You told me that you would be my Heaven. Right then, all my fears vanished, because I knew that I had made the right choice.

“My life had been reduced, but I had truly found my Heaven in your love. I stand by my choice to Fall, because it brought us together, and I would never be this happy otherwise.”

***

“OH, GODS! MY ANGEL!”

I feel just as cold as Pit must have. I don’t even feel Mist any more. Only a deep, icy pain in the core of my being.

(End Part 1)